From My Reading – May

“The way of the cross looks like failure. In fact, we could say that Christianity is about how to win by losing, how to let go creatively, how the only real ascent is descent. We need to be more concerned with following Jesus, which he told us to do numerous times, and less with worshipping Jesus—which he never once told us to do” (Richard Rohr).

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“In the stillness of the quiet, if we listen, we can hear the whisper in the heart giving strength to weakness courage to fear, hope to despair” (Howard Thurman).

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” When you and I embrace Jesus’ essential paradox—that to lose is to gain and to die is to live—we come to God, who gathers up the broken pieces of the world and makes them more complete and beautiful than they were before they broke. God integrates all fractious dualities into the wholeness of life that Christians call eternal salvation. It’s a life we get to live here and now, by grace and faith” (Rachel Srubas).

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Part of our collective story is how to meaningfully hold grief and hope, acknowledging what cannot be changed and still envisioning all that can” (Carrie Newcomer).

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” It has been said that “evil never rests.” So I practiced resting . . . that I would become the opposite of Evil” (Scott Erickson).

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“Nothing erases the past. There is repentance, there is atonement, and there is forgiveness. That is all, but that is enough” (Ted Chiang).

 

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Sing a New Song

“The old song of my spirit has wearied itself out.  It has long ago been learned by heart so that now it repeats itself over and over, bringing no added joy to my days or lift to my spirit. It is a good song, measured to a rhythm to which I am bound by ties of habit and spirit and timidity . . . But my life has passed beyond to other levels where the old song is meaningless.  I demand of the old song that it meet the need of present urgencies. Also, I know that the work of the old song, perfect in its place, is not for the new demand!

I will sing a new song. As difficult as it is, I must learn the new song that is capable of meeting the new need. I must fashion new words born of all the new growth of my life, my mind and my spirit. I must prepare for new melodies that have never been mine before, that all that is within me may lift my voice unto God . . .

I will sing, this day, a new song unto Thee, O God” (Howard Thurman).

I have attempted to write a blog for months now, based on this beautiful quote by Howard Thurman, a quote which has changed my thought processes, my ambition, my comfort level with myself and my relationships with friends and family.

After an 8-year battle with multiple myeloma (a rare blood cancer) and the death of my husband for whom I was a caregiver for many years, I emerged battle-scarred, exhausted, and cognizant that cancer w1ll win the battle whenever this second type of chemo stops working. I realize that I need to “learn the new song that is capable of meeting the new need.”

That learning process mostly involved accepting that my life was special to God and to my family and friends even though I am incapable of the type of service to others that  had been my life’s work and passion.

I had been a teacher of one sort or another for all of those forty years. I had written and had published books for new readers. I had been written for and been editor at my denomination’s magazine. I had founded adult literacy programs in every city that I lived in. I had been certified as a substance abuse counselor – a long-time goal that I never used because  years of work with a great counselor helped me see that my tendency to  enable would be detrimental not only to my own life, but also to those I wanted to serve.

I had retired from a 10- year career as as a senior manager with the National Multiple Sclerosis Society’s Michigan Chapter so that I could fulfill my need and desire to study spiritual formation. This  led to my final career as Director of Spiritual Formation for a very large church.  (You can find an accounting of some of these adventures in the My Journey section of this blog).

My cancer and the constant attempt to gain remission – and stay there – took and still take  time and energy. But my hardest battle has been with the guilt of no longer being a “helper.” Instead I was the one needing help. What value did I have to give the world? And was it worth living if I couldn’t be a helper?  Howard Thurman’s beautiful writing helped me find “new words,” “new growth” and “new melodies.”

My new life is very quiet, filled with books and magazines and TV shows of all stripes and topics.  I can no longer drive; moving without my walker is very dangerous. My mind, which for years was involved in planning and organizing and evaluating and training, is now focused on using all those gifts so I can live alone as long as possible. I enjoy the visits of my friends and am grateful for their help and that of my son and his family.  I’m surprised and excited every month when new readers become followers of this blog which I  rarely update.  Once in a while during a calm and quiet day, I still relapse and apologize to God for no long being active and helpful in his kingdom. I know that’s not really true and that God wants no apologies  – and I continue on with my quiet life.

Recently I (and my friends and family) have learned that this particular cancer as well as the constant chemotherapy are taking their toll on my cognitive functioning.  Perhaps I will never be able to write a blog post again. But most days, I read Howard Thurman’s words posted on my refrigerator and am grateful that I can  sing, this day, a new song unto Thee, O God.”

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From My Reading – April

“For success, like happiness, cannot be pursued; it must ensue, and it only does so as the unintended side effect of one’s personal dedication to a cause greater than oneself or as the by-product of one’s surrender to a person other than oneself” (Viktor Frankl).

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“A true sense of community creates a strong sense of individual personhood…. True individuals create true community. And true community creates true individuals” (Richard Rohr).

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“Justice is what love looks like in public” (Cornel West).

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How do you walk humbly with God? How do you? How do you walk humbly with anybody?… [By] coming to grips with who I am, what I am as accurately and as fully as possible: a clear-eyed appraisal of myself. And in the light of the dignity of my own sense of being I walk with God step by step as [God] walks with me. This is I, with my weaknesses and my strength, with my abilities and my liabilities; this is I, a human being myself! And it is that that God salutes. So that the more I walk with God and God walks with me, the more I come into the full-orbed significance of who I am and what I am. That is to walk humbly with God” (Howard Thurman)

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“You are loved just for being who you are, just for existing. You don’t have to do anything to earn it . . . No one can take this love away from you, and it will always be here” (Ram Dass).

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“Words of encouragement motivated by the wish for someone’s happiness can function as a source of revitalizing light, rousing courage and strength” (Daisaku Ikeda).

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“Joy is the transformation of our suffering, not the escape of all we have to face” (Mark Nepo).

 

 

 

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From My Reading – March

“The most important thing to remember is this: to be ready at any moment to give up what you are for what you might become” (W.E.B. Du Bois).

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“The prophets are “radical” teachers in the truest sense of the word. The Latin radix means root, and the prophets go to the root causes and root vices and “root” them out! Their educational method is to expose and accuse with no holds barred. Ministers and religion in general tend to concentrate on effects and symptoms, usually a mopping up exercise after the fact. As someone once put it, we throw life preservers to people drowning in the swollen stream, which is all well and good—but prophets work far upstream to find out why the stream is swollen in the first place”(Richard Rohr).

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“This call for a worldwide fellowship that lifts neighborly concern beyond one’s tribe, race, class, and nation is in reality a call for an all-embracing and unconditional love for all [humankind].… When I speak of love I am not speaking of some sentimental and weak response. I’m not speaking of that force which is just emotional bosh. I am speaking of that force which all of the great religions have seen as the supreme unifying principle of life. Love is somehow the key that unlocks the door which leads to ultimate reality” (Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.).

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“Change is brought about because ordinary people do extraordinary things” (Barack Obama).

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“And if you follow your truth down the road to peace and the affirmation of love, if you shine like a beacon for all to see, then the poetry of all the great dreamers and philosophers is yours to manifest in a nation, a world community, and a Beloved Community that is finally at peace with itself” (John Lewis).

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“One day at a time – this is enough. Do not look back and grieve over the past for it is gone; and do not be troubled about the future, for it has not yet come. Live in the present, and make it so beautiful it will be worth remembering” (Mary Morrison).

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“The importance of a God who engages in lament with God’s people cannot be overestimated. For, at bottom, the practice of lament is the practice of truth-telling, the practice of naming the injustice, naming the pain, naming the horror that violence and lies create” ( Sylvia C. Keesmaat and Brian J. Walsh).

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“. . . many of us seek community solely to escape the fear of being alone. Knowing how to be solitary is central to the art of loving. When we can be alone, we can be with others without using them as a means of escape” (bell hooks).

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From my Reading – February

“We should honor the gifts of the mind to understand and make sense of religious experience. A framework of convictions provides a circumference for the practice of faith. For instance, I’ll sign on to a declaration proclaiming God is the Creator, Jesus is the Christ, and the Spirit is the Giver of Life. But too often Western Christianity has compressed faith into rational formulas capable of consent without consequence, partitioned from emotive experience, and devoid of mystery” (Wes Granberg-Michaelson).

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” . . .  it is not an enviable position, this Christian thing. Following Jesus is a vocation to share the fate of God for the life of the world. To allow what God for some reason allows—and uses. And to suffer ever so slightly what God suffers eternally. Often, this has little to do with believing the right things about God—beyond the fact that God is love itself” (Richard Rohr).

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“A practice of gratitude is not about dismissing sadness, anger, fear, or confusion. Rather, it offers us the opportunity to see that we often experience multiple feelings at once; to welcome joy into the same places where we hold grief; to turn our attention to what is quietly growing and breathing day by day, which, to our possible surprise, includes ourselves” (Kristin Lin).

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“I don’t want to distance the secular but always bring it closer. It’s only then that ordinary things and moments become epiphanies of God’s presence. Some man said to me once, “I want to become more spiritual.” Yet God is inviting us to inhabit the fullness of our humanity. God holds out wholeness to us. Let’s not settle for just spiritual. We are sacramental to our core when we think that everything is holy. The holy not just found in the supernatural but in the Incarnational here and now. The truth is that sacraments are happening all the time if we have the eyes to see. . . .” (Father Greg Boyle).

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“A sky full of God’s children! Each galaxy, each star, each living creature, every particle and sub-atomic particle of creation, we are all children of the Maker. From a sub-atomic particle with a life span of a few seconds, to a galaxy with a life span of billions of years, to us human creatures somewhere in the middle in size and age, we are . . . children of God, made in God’s image” (Madelyn Le Engle).

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“What if not a word is lost? / What if every word we cast; / Cold, cunning, cold, accurst / Every word we cut and paste, / Echoes to us from the past, / Fares and finds us first and last, / Haunts and hunts us down?” (Malcolm Guite).

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 “God is at home. It is we who have gone out for a walk” (Meister Eckhart).

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From My Reading – January

“Jesus never told us to put our trust in the larger institutions of culture or even the church. That doesn’t mean they are bad or that we should abandon them, but we must recognize that they are also subject to the paschal mystery, the dying and the rising of all things. And I think we must be honest that we’re at the downside of the curve. All the indices suggest that we are at the end of the dominance of the United States, Western civilization, and even of Christianity. The question for us becomes: What will we do about it?” (Richard Rohr).

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I bless this day for the wonderful adventure it can become as I walk through it with the eyes of wonder rather than boredom, use every opportunity to express peace rather than irritation, and choose love over fear”  (Pierre Pradervand).

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Belief, the act of holding a set or system of beliefs, is not the same thing as faith, even though we often use the words imprecisely and interchangeably” (Brian McLaren).

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“Humility is to see things as they are. It isn’t to think of oneself as a worthless worm who God reluctantly redeemed. It is to fix our heart on God’s worth—which is the literal definition of worship—and know our worth in light of God’s worth. Jesus could be lowly and humble of heart because he knew who and whose he was. He had nothing to prove, so he could come as a baby and grow into a man who loved freely” (Brian Morykon).

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“I enjoy watching birds. They remind me of that line from the old song by Civilla D. Martin, ‘His eye is on the sparrow/And I know He watches me.’ December in Michigan, where I live means deep snow and frigid temperatures, which makes life hard for birds. So I feed them. And I remember that through the birth of Jesus, God provides for my deepest spiritual needs, too” (Lou Lotz).

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As I see it . . .  God acts in history and in your and my brief histories not as the puppeteer who sets the scene and works the strings but rather as the great director who no matter what role fate casts us in conveys to us somehow from the wings, if we have our eyes, ears, hearts open and sometimes even if we don’t, how we can play those roles in a way to enrich and ennoble and hallow the whole vast drama of things including our own small but crucial parts in it” (Frederick Buechner).

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“Let me add my bit today. Let me hunger for justice and then do it. Let me show compassion. Let me write an encouraging note or say an uplifting word. Once again, let me live today in such away that on your great day of judgment I can look back on this day and not be ashamed” (Cornelius Plantinga.)

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“I try to avoid looking forward or backward, and try to keep looking upward” ( Charlotte Bronte).”

 

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From My Reading – December

“We are to be grateful not just in the good times, but also in the bad times; to be grateful not just in plenty, but also in need; to maintain thankfulness not just in laughter, but also through tears and sorrow” (Brian McLaren).

 

“Any Christian “perfection” is, in fact, our ability to include, forgive, and accept our imperfection. As I’ve often said, we grow spiritually much more by doing it wrong than by doing it right. That might just be the central lesson of how spiritual growth happens, yet nothing in us wants to believe it” (Richard Rohr).

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“Gratefulness is a touchstone, offering us what we need not simply to survive difficult times but to appreciate them for their exquisite complexity, buried blessings, rich opportunities, and deep teachings” (Kristi Nelson).

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“Society will always look to the rich to solve its problems. Whether it’s Musk with Twitter, the wealthy businesspeople running for political office, or our cabal of nightmare corporations we’ve entrusted to fight climate change, we remain erroneously convinced rich people hold the answers to the world’s problems.

We must begin recognizing that the rich are no more special than we are, and wealth is not a blue checkmark of competence or virtue. Not in this world and certainly not in heaven. And if we can do that, then perhaps we can also begin to understand that if God’s community does indeed belong to the poor, as Jesus said, then they might be worthy subjects of our respect in the here and now” (Tyler Huckabee).

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“In truth, the heart must crack open if the soul is to become free. And you simply cannot think your way into that” (Terry Patton).

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“God doesn’t reveal his grand design. He reveals himself. He doesn’t show why things are as they are. He shows his face. And Job says, “I had heard of thee by the hearing of the ear, but now my eyes see thee” (Job 42:5). Even covered with sores and ashes, he looks oddly like a man who has asked for a crust and been given the whole loaf.  At least for the moment”  (Frederick Buechner)

 

 

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From My Reading – October

“My story is important not because it is mine, God knows, but because if I tell it anything like right, the chances are you will recognize that in many ways it is also yours. Maybe nothing is more than important than that we keep track, you and I, of these stories of who we are and where we have come from and the people we have met along the way because it is precisely through these stories in all the particularity, as I have have long believed and often said, that God makes himself known to each of us most powerfully and personally. If this is true, it means that to lose track of our stories is to be profoundly impoverished not only humanly but also spiritually” (Frederick Buechner).

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“I can see that one loving gesture is practically divine. We have to do small things and believe a big difference is coming. It’s like the miraculous drops of water that seep through mountain limestone. They gather themselves into springs that flow into creeks that merge into rivers that find their way to oceans. Our work is to envision the drops as oceans. We do our small parts and know a powerful ocean of love and compassion is downstream. Each small gesture  can lead to liberation. The bravest thing we can do in this world is not cling to old ideas or fear of judgment, but step out and just do something for love’s sake” (Becca Stevens).

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“It turns out it is extremely difficult to draw close to someone you find absolutely abhorrent. How do we listen to someone when their beliefs are disgusting? Or enraging? Or terrifying? . . . An invisible wall forms between us and them, a chasm that seems impossible to cross. We don’t even know why we should try to cross it. . . . In these moments, we can choose to remember that the goal of listening is not to feel empathy for our opponents, or validate their ideas, or even change their mind in the moment. Our goal is to understand them. . . .

When listening gets hard, I focus on taking the next breath. I pay attention to sensations in my body: heat, clenching, and constriction. I feel the ground beneath my feet. Am I safe? If so, I stay and slow my breath again, quiet my mind, and release the pressure that pushes me to defend my position. I try to wonder about this person’s story and the possible wound in them. I think of an earnest question and try to stay curious long enough to be changed by what I hear. Maybe, just maybe, my opponent will begin to wonder about me in return, ask me questions, and listen to my story. Maybe their views will start to break apart and new horizons will open in the process. . . . Then again, maybe not. It doesn’t matter as long as the primary goal of listening is to deepen my own understanding. Listening does not grant the other side legitimacy. It grants them humanity—and preserves our own” (Valarie Kaur).

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“If something comes toward us with grace and can pass through us and toward others with grace, we can trust it as the voice of God” (Richard Rohr ).

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“If your everyday practice is to open to all your emotions, to all the people you meet, to all the situations you encounter, without closing down, trusting that you can do that – then that will take you as far as you can go. And then you’ll understand all the teachings that anyone has ever taught” (Pema Chodron).

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“When I dare to be powerful – to use my strength in the service of my vision, then it becomes less and less important whether I am afraid” (Audre Lorde).

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