Most of our world is living in a time of chaos, emotionally if not physically. Getting up in the morning can be overwhelming. Following through on our agenda for the day AND keeping a loving spirit while we take each step is difficult. Even the simplest details can feel like pressure.
For the first two-thirds of my life I was fearful of every thing: a new experience, a new place, a new teacher, a new job, new encounters with new people. Even the smallest issues tied me up in knots. I was even nervous about going into a supermarket with which I was unfamiliar because I was afraid I was would look stupid if I couldn’t easily find the checkout lanes – as if anyone were watching! I’ve overcome most of that anxiety, but last week I noticed a familiar twisting in my stomach and traced it to the need to take the car in for a new air bag. (Obviously this is not a difficult task for most, but it played into my lifetime biggest insecurity – not knowing what to do.) In some despair because an elderly false narrative was taking over my serenity, I prayed that the Holy Spirit would help me deal with this.
I drove into the car lot and to the location where the service entrance was located. I didn’t see it. In confusion, I parked the car. As I got out, I noticed an old friend standing by a van with the dealership logo on it. He immediately hurried over to me. “I thought that was your car!” he said. “Good to see you!”
We spent some time catching up (as I got more nervous because I would be late for the appointment). Finally he asked why I was here. I told him about the air bag and confessed that I was confused about where to go to get it fixed. He smiled, nodded, and told me that everything had been changed around. He walked me to the end of the building, pointed out where to turn, and advised me to just drive up to the service door and it would automatically open so I could drive in. We said our goodbyes, and I thanked him for being my angel. My day had instantly brightened.
This is such a small, insignificant experience that I debated writing about it. But then the importance of seeing God’s love and protection in all of our small, seemingly stupid, experiences is worth writing about. Marking those small blessings in our hearts over and over again helps us relinquish our huge experiences and wait expectantly for the Spirit’s guidance.
Today I saw a quote that reminded me of my Al-Anon training which encouraged me to practice living one day (or hour or moment) at a time:
Today is only a small manageable segment of
of time in which our difficulties
need not overwhelm us.
When we are overwhelmed, we can stew about it or we can choose to turn it over to God and expect and await God’s solutions.